id be glad to
she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
Whenever I see women with terribly drawn on brows, I just wanna tackle them and redo them and run away. I'll be Brow-lady. The beauty superhero
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
Too bad, iambic pentameter is a drunk specialty of mine.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch
Randomize
