Well apparently he's into motor boating.
I cant find my shoes, my wallet, or my keys, but i know where your sister is.
Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
If you come, call before you come in. I'm tanning my balls. Enjoy that visual.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
We had sex on his grandparents floor... the taxidermy deer was staring at me the whole time!
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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