I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
So many bounce houses so little time
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
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