This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
Getting wasted on top of a casino. My penis is so much higher than everyone else's right now.
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize
