I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Randomize
