the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
explaining to a nurse how i all most cut my finger off playing beer pong, she def just hand me a AA booklet.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize