cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton
i said paris hilton
thats even worse
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Randomize
