Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
I pretty much landed into this relationship penis first
I want you to come over here and spit coffee in my mouth like a momma bird feeding a baby bird. That hung over.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
You ate ashes out of my bong
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
