How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
Hes drunk and dancing naked. I can hear his dick smacking his legs from the next room.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
Randomize
