i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
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