Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
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