I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
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