i just wanna soil my oats bro
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
Randomize
