My brain says no but my pants say off.
I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
Little girl was fucking around on the train and completely ran her head into a pole. Totally burst out laughing as she cried. Her mom was not amused. I don't think I should be a Mom. EVER.
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
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