New invention idea: vibrating tampons
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
do you remember yelling out "insecurity makes my pussy dry!" unnecessarily loud at the bar?
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
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