so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
Well. No wine. And no real mixers. I'm using vodka and grape juice and calling it Slurrrlot. Happy Holidays bitch.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
Do you remember ripping my condom off last night while yelling "I DEMAND MY MEAT RAW" like a Viking?
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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