Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
I just found a wine bottle in my shower. Must have been a good night.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
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