We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."
That wasn't a compliment.
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
Randomize
