Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
I can text with my tongue
my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
I hit her tiny dog with a horseshoe an hour ago. Her and her mom cried as it laid on the ground shaking. Im drunk.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
I know its 2 in the morning and everything. But i just straight up yelled "DON'T YOU UNDERSTAND THIS WORLD IS DIFFICULT ENOUGH AS IT IS WITHOUT YOU PULLING THIS BULLSHIT ON ME" to my taco. Because it fell apart on me. I think i might be cracking under this finals pressure.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
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