Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
