so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
Just walked out of 7 11 still in uniform when 4 girls in bikinis in a convertable screamed "we fuck firefighters!"
Career choice validated
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
They came over the loud speaker and said "no laying on the dance floor.." I thought i was dancing, but apparently that's just the way it started out.
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
Randomize
