did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
just threw the rents a curveball by making french toast and bacon when i came home sober. good luck tellin when im high/drunk now.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
I told the DJ last night to play Third Eye Blind before 1:45 and just pointed at him as I walked away. He didn't do it and at 1:45 I just walked out pointing at him, without my friends
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
Randomize
