I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
Question: does the slut gene come from the mother or the father? im trying to figure out who to blame.
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
I need water and some morals
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize