omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Hey, umm this is awkward but I want to apologize in case you find gum in your pubes. Not sure if I swallowed it or spit it out. It's all a blur.
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
Nothing like banging your nurse in the shower while staying in the hospital
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
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