How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
I'm drinking too much free beer
Thats like saying one owns too many kittens. It's not possible.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
I just took a shower and found half a cookie melted under my boob. Please tell me there's a reason
Holy walk of shame. Fuck someone's house. I walked past a family eating their free continental breakfast wearing yesterday's makeup
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
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