Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
Randomize
