DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
8===D
That's the bat signal to come over and fuck me.
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
Randomize
