Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
six ambien and a bong later...he was calling me blueberry princess who need rescuing from the evil oven, and he was sir Eatsalot.
Seriously, I am going to crawl in a hole, sew my vagina shut, and spit acid on any man that comes near me.
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
Randomize
