Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
I fell asleep while we were Skyping and woke up to his balls bouncing in front of the camera while he sang "Wakey Wakey!" over and over again. Merryfuckingchristmas.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
My drunk neighbor is arguing with a goose in his yard. This was the highlight of my day.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
When the neighbors threatened to call the cops, he yelled at them that American laws didnt apply to him because he was Danish. He then sang his own version of "America fuck yeah" along to daft punk, then fell down the porch steps. Can we keep him?!?!
It's shark week go big or go home
Well, that's not my fault. I make decisions all the time when I'm drunk.
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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