you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
There's a mirror laying face down next to me. A looooong full body mirror. By the looks of it it fell off the wall last night and was within centimeters of shattering on my head. Awesome.
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
So when I eventually, if ever, find someone I'd like to marry, do you think having people fly to africa for a lion king themed wedding is too much?
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
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