I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
I'll have a whole suitcase of emergency bacon with me obviously
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
Randomize
