He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Randomize
