ugly people sure do ruin things
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
I just ordered a 3 square foot pizza. This is how to beat an eating disorder.
Putting the night light in my bathroom cabinet was the best idea ever. Awesome for puking while light sensitive
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize
