i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
i just threw up in front of the washington monument. such a scenic puke.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
Apparently i asked the cab driver how much the ride was going to cost, (he said about $25) then i offered him 50 to let me drive the cab...
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
Randomize
