"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
I put in a tampon while driving a moving vehicle. I feel like this is simultaneously a new low and the sort of feat that deserves a merit badge.
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
Randomize