just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
I honestly get shocked all over again every time I pull his pants down. It's one of those feelings you never get tired of.
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
There's a random table in the kitchen...and it's not the kitchen table...we don't know where it came from
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize
