Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
i wondered why i had so many splinters in my hand, then i went out to my car and remembered id stolen an entire cactus
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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