summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
I was crying hysterically and you wouldn't stop petting my ear and shushing me every time I tried to say something.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Just successfully went through airport security with shrooms. It's gonna be a fucking awesome new years
Just took a shot of tequila with a random guy at the supermarket. Happy cinco de fourth.
Anyhow, I am sorry for being obnoxious about wanting more sex and forcing you to eat lunchmeat off of my ginormous nipples. I knew that you weren't going to succumb to my pushy demands
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Just woke up and read the text that drunk me sent you, i take it all back, and you can't have my power puff girl pillow either.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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