Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
everyone is single if you try hard enough
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
I just met his wife...she told me they have been having marriage problems and are spending his paychecks on marriage counseling...then she cried on my shoulder...NOW i feel like a bitch.
I have bruises on my ass from her spurs. God bless Texas.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
So I bought that bathing suit yesterday and got buyers remorse so I returned it today and then stole it. Win win.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
Randomize
