they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
So this morning everyone commended me for puking over the porch. No one else made it that far...
Let me just get through this whole court subpoena thing and then ill go back to buying alcohol for minors.
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
They're doing CPR to someone in the middle of Victoria's Secret. Way to block the undies, damnit!
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