I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
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