Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
I won't apologize to a one balled man
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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