Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
i caught a guy at work today stealing condoms. i let him go when i realized that they were extra small.
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
we are currently watching a singalong porn...just thought you should know
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
Randomize
