Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
I only get commercials for vodka and Rogaine now. You're exactly right, Hulu. That's exactly right.
My younger brother just got high fives from all my guy cousins for fucking my best friend. I hate family gatherings.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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