talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
If a vagina could give out awards, you should be preparing an acceptance speech.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
It was 3 am when she drunkenly tried to deep-fry a banana.
How'd she do that?
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
Randomize
