you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
Passive mediator is your role in this relationship. My role is dick punching arsonist
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
The only thing I remember is doing a toddlers and tiaras dance routine onstage. I fucking CURTSIED.
OMG stop. Pretty feet? Sparkle baby!
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
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