i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I wish I had my old roomstes number so I could send him pictures from lastnight... I had a blast banging his "true love" now that I think about it we're even don't worry about that gas bill you didn't pay. Ur girl worked it off!
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
He just kept telling me how to do certain things. It was like I was fucking my sex ed teacher
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
my mom just asked if she should wash your furry handcuffs with the lights or darks
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
If I die it's either cuz I undercooked my burger or because I used questionable cheese. I have no pants on, so if there's a wellness check, you go in first.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
If one more person says Merry Christmas to me I’m going to take a pen out of my pocketbook and stab them in the eye
Randomize
