i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
Good rule of thumb: only list personal references with whom you have hallucinated
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
Randomize
