a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
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