ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
I'm heating up a hotdog using a candle.
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
Friendly reminder that on the walk home you tripped but instead of falling to the sidewalk, you tried to save it and ended up headbutting my ex-boyfriend in the balls. ILU.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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